Food For Thought

Imagine a wonderful Mexican fusion/experimental restaurant, filled with fun, themed decor and cute tables made of recycled license plates. Now imagine sitting in a wonderful, high-top table, next to people you love. Now, add this DJ who wants to pimp his DJ skills, RIGHT NEXT TO YOUR TABLE. AHHHH. Atmosphere: Good, besides the music (or should I say NOT beside the music). It had a very temporary vibe; something about the light aluminum chairs and the license plate table-top covers that made our meal seem transitory. There was a cyan car door hanging behind the host's podium too. We were elevated on a table which was SO far removed from the booths and the bar that we were nearly out the door. There was a garage door that seemed like it was there just for aesthetics, and a guy playing badly remixed club music to ruin it. Tater tots in a tin Some more tins, but this time with tacos Actual Food: Like a memey type of Mexican/American focus. For an appetizer, instead ...

I will not discuss the intricacies of melts vs. grilled cheeses here, but I will try my best to not use the two interchangeably. We all know how that turns out ( "You people make me sick." ).  Melt is situated on a plain little corner in Avondale, within walking distance of other trendy, delicious restaurants like Saw's Soul Kitchen , Big Spoon Creamery , and Taco Morro Loco (Which I will eat at ASAP), meaning its continued existence says something about its novelty’s ability to bring in customers and its food’s tastiness to make them come back. Atmosphere: Bright and airy. Melt doesn’t have a big sign announcing their name, they just have their food truck with their logo parked out front. There’s ~5 parking spots, kids playing cornhole outside, and the whole building looks patchy and something a DIY dad would build in his DIY Dads Club. This isn’t bad, it’s just their vibe. For instance, there’s a full suit of armor inside, painted a pastel pink. Their waiting a...

I’ll be upfront with you. I don’t remember this restaurant. Me and my squad arrived in Boston, MA on below freezing night and, being used to Alabama weather, our brains immediately kicked into survival mode. There was no time to notice the hypnotically large Citgo sign, nor to appreciate the extensive, heated bus and train system that saved us from death and allowed us to find the nearest restaurant that was A. heated and B. not sketchy. Welcome to the neighborhood pub of Brighton, Devlin’s Restaurant. Atmosphere: Cozy. Pretty dim lighting with fake candles that were actually LEDs. I don’t mean like “look into your date’s eyes and feel time slip away” dim, I mean “I cannot see my date’s eyes” dim. They do have some nice fire-pillar-tornado things from the indoor pictures on their websites, but I can’t confirm that personally. Their tables were wooden, I think, and were easily forgettable. Their cups were kinda funny, like stout wine glasses. They had a thick stem and were stret...

An Aerial View of Tip Top that I did not capture. Enjoy. You’ve never seen a more niche locale. Tip Top Grill is literally a reconfigured mini gas station on a cliff. Past their fancy black gothic fence is a rocky death slope. But right behind it is an affordable and cool local American diner. You know how it goes. Or you’re about to, at least. Atmosphere: Imagine an old-school college dorm for 2. That’s the space. The division between worker and consumer is a high, tiled bar where the workers are probably grillin’ it up. I dunno, I’ve never been back there, but the cooks make convincing burger-flip motions. There is a freezer with local business stickers all over it, which establishes them as a local locale. Above the bar is 2 feet of space to see their operations then a big menu sign. It is readable from outside, helpful thanks to the limited space inside. Against the right wall in the back is probably a french fry frier. French frier? Again, never seen it. All I know ...

Ever wonder to yourself why the Freshman 15 happens? Because of wonderful cafeterias like this one, located in the Pope Student Center in Dalton State College, North Georgia. Who says American food is just food stolen from other cultures? Not Pope. Atmosphere: First off. This building sits on an air isthmus, embedded in a one story hill with 3/4 of its sides 10 feet in the air, inaccessible except to Spiderman or Alex Honnold (first solo-climber of El Capitan!), which sort of symbolically sets up its quality. It raises college food to a new level entirely! The air inside is clear, with good natural and artificial lighting. 3/4 of the walls are floor to ceiling windows, and the roofs are very tall and made of some kind of dimpled concrete, if it were the dimples of a giant. A huge vertical porthole, or skylight, illuminated the middle of this very fresh ground. Very clean looking carpet (questionable and controversial choice, by the way. Seems dangerous (prone to spill...

Who is Ted? Who is TED? Ted Turner the Third?! The man who CREATED CNN?! The man who was the largest private landowner in America until 2011? Who uses his 15 ranches to raise the largest herd of bison in THE WORLD, re-popularizing bison meat in his misnamed Montana Grill actually in Atlanta? Yea. That Ted. Andy here with the scoop. Atmosphere: Enter. See a bar. Bartender has a manbun, serves root beer. Good, IBC root beer. Probably also alcohol but I wouldn’t know because I am a good kid. He seems happy. The floor tiles make a hexagonal mosaic. Deeper into the restaurant, all the lights are yellowed, and the room remains dark. It feels mysterious until your eyes adjust. Then it seems romantic. To pass into the back of the restaurant is to not be seated in the 2-4 person booths, with full backs that go 7 feet up. Only very tall people will not have privacy in those booths. For god’s sake, they’re even a bit enclosed from the entrance. I sat at a circular table in the middle...

A bustling wooden building on the South Rim of the Grand Canyon, Maswik lodge conceals a cafeteria with size on par with a university and quality worthy of at least half of a Michelin star. The quality present in a variety of styles is impressive, but an emphasis on pizza and open air environment set this diner apart. Atmosphere : Nice chandeliers with metal “cages”. The style was very angular throughout the place, edges were prominent in the roof and walls. There were clear borders of wood between sections of the building, like the entrance to the main hall and the entrance to the pizza bar. Nothing fancy, just straight pieces of wood. Not sure I liked the continuous wood tiling style. Kind of monotonous for the eyes. Also easily flammable. Because it was as food hall, the restaurant was huge, with large windows on the edges of the building looking out at the beautiful road and trees right before the edge of the Grand Canyon. Basically, thanks for the effort, but unless t...

Considering the last Hard Rock Cafe I went to served taquitos that gave me food poisoning and ruined my trip to Universal, this establishment immeasurably improved my opinion. A popular restaurant for no particular reason besides being a famous brand, Hard Rock sells American food while playing American music and then sells you merch to commemorate your freedom-filled experience. Seating: As with most places when a group comes in with a voucher, we were ushered to the crappiest seats and seated immediately. People don’t like speaking up for the most part, so restaurants can make it more comfortable to stay in the crappy area than to complain and get only barely slightly nicer chairs. The chairs and table were plain black wood, and felt like hard rock (pun). Decor: Nice ceiling decorations and lighting. The roof was dominated by a big hanging disk with lights, whose pattern looked like a Mr. Pibb can. The bar had lights under the table illuminated the pastel blue/brown tili...

On a cold California morning, In-N-Out bustles with voices and smells. In contrast to Hana Zen, this restaurant was completely packed to around 30% over max occupancy (don’t report them). I actually hadn’t heard of their famous secret menu until today, but I got acquanted with the beautiful, price defying fast-food that is In-N-Out Burgers. Seating: Parking was packed, but since this establishment built it self next to a Costco, alternative parking was not far away. The chairs, despite being all metal, were comfortably warm, but not someone’s-been-sitting-in-this-chair warm. The booths were also easy to get into and out of, and seemed to have a wider entrance than McDonald’s booths. Like traditional fast food, you seated yourself, which I had a hard time doing after going through a line stretched across half the perimeter of the building, but unlike traditional fast food, they provided a bench and bar beside the register, already prepared to be packed with backed up orders. ...